Blonde Joke Screensaver: Help Desk

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Blonde Joke Screensaver

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Blonde Joke Screensaver Help
Common problems
(The Most Common Problem) I get the message "Jokes database cannot be found" when the screensaver runs.
This occurs when the file 'Jokes.txt' is not in your Windows directory. If you get this error message, open the screensaver zip file that you downloaded and extract the file 'Jokes.txt' to your Windows directory (this is usually c:\windows). If you still have problems please contact us (see below).
I unzipped the screensaver to the Windows directory, but when I go into the Control Panel, the screensaver is not in the list.
Make sure that the screensaver is in your Windows directory. The screensaver should NOT be in the System directory.
The screensaver appears in the list, but when I press Settings or Preview, nothing happens and the screensaver doesn't run after the delay has elapsed. (Applies to Windows 98)
You have an older version of the screensaver which might be causing problems. Please go to our download page and get the most recent version.

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The screensaver does appear in the list, but it won't run or preview. (Applies to Windows version prior to Windows 98)

You need to get VBRUN300.DLL. The screen saver is written in Microsoft Visual Basic, and all Visual Basic 3.0 applications depend on this file. It can be downloaded free from Microsoft. It can also be found on GO VBRUN on CompuServe, and Keyword VBRUN on AOL, as well as computing magazine cover CD-ROMS.

When I attempt to preview or run the screensaver, I get this error message: "A required DLL file, MSVBVM50.DLL, was not found" and then the screensaver quits.

Recent versions of the Blonde Joke screensaver are written in Visual Basic 5.0, and all VB5 applications depend on this file. You will need to search Microsoft's site for it. AOL users can find this file on Keyword VBRUN, and it can also be found on the cover CD-ROMs of various computing magazines (such as "Computer Shopper", "PC Magazine" etc.)

I get the message "Unexpected error, quitting" when the screensaver loads.

It sounds like your copy of the screensaver got corrupted during the download. Unfortunately with the Internet, this sometimes does happen. Please download the screensaver again.

I get an error message like "Runtime error:" followed by a number and a few words such as "Subscript out of range", "Input past end of file" etc. and the screensaver then immediately quits.

This is an error in the programming code of the screensaver itself. Please report this problem to us by e-mailing sky@erupt.com. You should include the exact text of any error message and when you received the error message. Please also see the "effective error-writing" text below.

The settings window is too big and fills up all of the screen. I can't get rid of it unless I shut my computer down.

We are aware of this problem and it will be fixed in a future version of the screensaver. Until then, please use one of the solutions below:
Increase your display's resolution
(Recommended for advanced users only)

Click Start.
Click Settings.
Click Control Panel.
Double-click the Display icon.
Click the Settings tab.
Drag the Screen area slider to the right (towards More)
When your resolution is at a level like 1024 * 768, click OK.
Work around the problem:

When the settings window appears, do not press any key or click anywhere.
Press Enter. The settings screen will be displayed.
After saving the settings, you'll be returned to the "intro window". Press tab and then enter - you should then be returned to the Control Panel.

Asking for help

If your problem isn't listed above, or you want to contact DeepLake regarding the Blonde Jokes screen saver, please e-mail sky@erupt.com.

However, please note the following effective error-writing points to ensure that our technical support staff can fix the problem as soon as possible:

Use a good subject: a blank subject line will almost certainly lead to delays in replying to your e-mail. Examples of bad subject lines are: "HELP IT WON'T WORK!!!", "screensaver", "It will not work!!!". Examples of good subject lines are: "Blonde screensaver doesn't appear in list", "Blonde SS crashes with error 'device not ready'".
Include as much information as possible: if you send an e-mail saying "I downloaded the screensaver and it didn't work" , this is not very useful to us. Computers vary wildly in their configuration and set up, so we really need to know many details like what version of Windows you're running, what steps you did to cause the error or problem to occur, etc.
Mention the screensaver! It sounds obvious, but many people don't tell us what screensaver they're having trouble with. We have two screensavers and are planning on releasing more soon, so we really need to know which one you're haveing trouble with.
Please give us the exact wording of an error message. If you write and say "The screensaver did not work, it gave me an error ", finding the problem is like trying to find a needle in a haystack. The error could literally be one out of thousands. We just cannot emphasise enough how important it is to include the exact error text.

(Sorry to sound so boring, but without an accurate and useful bug, error or problem report, we simply cannot fix your problem!)

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